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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28065279">I suppose it's time (to let myself fall)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowstormDreams/pseuds/ShadowstormDreams'>ShadowstormDreams</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Shadowstorm's MCYT FanFictions That Often Include Angst [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, How Do I Tag, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Other, Platonic Relationships, SBI Family Time!, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicidal Tommyinnit, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, but still minecraft but real life, dream actually has some emotion, dreamsmp roleplay, help me plz, i feel sad, i love the sbi family dyanamic, no beta we die like stupid block men, rip tommy, three lives</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:48:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,551</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28065279</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowstormDreams/pseuds/ShadowstormDreams</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The blonde stared down at the lava below, bubbling brightly. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, maybe... just maybe, he could escape his feelings. After all, there was nothing left to live for, right? Just one step off of the charred blackstone, just one... </p><p> </p><p>______<br/>OR<br/>______</p><p> </p><p> <br/>TommyInnit has a hard time coping with his exile, the (loss?) of his best friend, and... Dream, in general. So, he turns to a severe way of escaping it all.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>______<br/>OR<br/>______<br/>Shadowstorm runs out of angsty fanfics so she writes one herself.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dave | Technoblade &amp; Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson, No Romantic Relationship(s), Sleepy Bois Inc. - Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Shadowstorm's MCYT FanFictions That Often Include Angst [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2064246</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>173</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. One Step</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>HUGE TW: Suicide/Suicidal thoughts. Emotional Manipulation. Please leave if you are uncomfortable with any of that, or anything close to it. Know your limits.<br/>PLEASE REMEMBER: This is based off of the roleplayed characters portrayed on the DreamSMP, not the CC themselves. Uh- SMP!Dream is a bitch.<br/>COMMENTS: Be respectful and kind. It's not that difficult.<br/>MORE WRITING: If you have any ideas you would like to share, leave them in the comments! I'm honestly not sure if anyone will see this but... hey! A depressed, angst-loving, sleep-deprived person can hope!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tommy sighed. He ran his fingers of the encryption in the gift of a compass he held in his right hand.<br/>'<em>Your Tubbo.'</em><br/>Oh, how he missed those days. When he would play around with Tubbo, chasing each other around with swords, never with the true intent to harm. He missed toiling up the slope to the shared house, (Wilbur had a habit of calling it the 'Sleepy Mansion', although it really was a cozy little cottage), slumping over into his bed, and falling asleep to the soft strumming of his brother's guitar, the humming of his (adoptive father) while he sat on the downstairs couch, reading, or to the little clinks and pounds on the wall from his other brother's training sword.<br/>Feeling tears drip down his face, he stared out at the ocean in from of him, the setting sun changing the color reflecting in his once-bright blue eyes. They were slowly fading, losing their color. Ghostbur had tried to help by giving some of his own 'Blue', which really was just a lump of... something that looked suspiciously like dye.<br/>Ghostbur. The ghost was oblivious to Tommy's decreasing mental health. Ghostbur wasn't his brother. He was just a shell of the person Tommy knew, loved, even. Ghostbur acted happier than Wilbur was in his last months. Although he was happier, it wasn't the same. Ghostbur didn't remember any of it. All of the memories he had made in his part life, gone. And with it, Tommy's sanity.<br/>Things would be so much better if his family was here, if they cared. He didn't want to check his communicator to see the mocking messages from Phil, or the snarky comments from Technoblade. He wanted to curl up on the couch with them, fall asleep in an uncomfortable position, only to wake up finding that someone in his family had moved him in the middle of the night. Probably Technoblade.<br/>Techno was the insomniac of the family, hardly sleeping, awake at ungodly hours. The man would farm potatoes for eight hours at one time, no breaks. Heh. Tommy wonders if he still does that now. Considering this, Technoblade's house was not very far from his own... camp.<br/>Tommy refused to acknowledge this place as home. His home, where his heart truly lay, would always be with his friends and family, L'manburg, and the Sleepy Mansion.<br/>Tubbo had betrayed him. He had exiled him at Dream's command. His own best friend. Was it so much to ask, just to act like a child for once with no consequences? Tommy supposes not.<br/>Dream was manipulating Tommy. It was clear to see, but the worst thing was that it was working. Tommy had given up on everything else, so why not just fall into an endless cycle of manipulation and blowing up armour?<br/>Technoblade turned traitor. Once his (former?) brother had unleashed the Withers, all Hell had broken lose.<br/>Phil gave up on him. At the time when he needed his father most, the mad had given up on Tommy. After a while, the ignoring slowly faded into taunts, and cruel arguments, something that Tommy NEVER would have expected from his dad, but this was different. The other was not his dad, he was Philza.<br/>Wilbur had died. He had basically committed suicide. After exploding L'manburg, our fucking home, he asked dad- Philza, to kill him. So he did. The sword went right through his chest, leaving a long, trailing wound that may never be healed. That must have been the breaking point for Philza.</p><p>Suicide. Tommy wondered if Wilbur felt better, even though he caused misery to almost anyone who knew him. Tommy doesn't think anyone would miss him. Smiling, he gripped the compass harder, watching as the needle twitched a little bit, before lying still.<br/>Maybe it was the end for him. Maybe, just maybe, it was time.<br/>Crying out, the sixteen-year-old screamed his pain to the long-gone sun. Instead, stars were twinkling faintly, and the moon's top was just visible above the crest the treeline. As the sobs racked his body, Tommy's blue eyes angled down toward the compass.</p><p>
  <strong>Tap.</strong>
</p><p><br/>Cracks like a spiderweb ran across the smooth glass of the beloved item. It was dropped to the ground, big, fat, glimmering tears landing on the sand next to it. Anyone who saw this sight may have gone to comfort Tommy, but not Dream. Lurking next to a tree, behind his porcelain mask, the green-eyed male was smirking. He had finally broken. In the back of his mind, the masked man felt a glimmer of doubt, or regret. he couldn't tell, but pushed it away anyways.</p><p>The outline of the exile glowed in the moonlight, small prisims shining where the soft light shown through tears. Rips and bruises were visible, but Tommy did not seem to notice them. His grief was centered on his life. He had nothing left to live for. He should just give up. Maybe then he'd be happier. Like Ghostbur. The others wouldn't even miss him. Except maybe Ranboo. Even then, the bicolored teen didn't visit him that often.<br/>Tommy wishes he could see Tubbo one last time, even if there was a strong connection of hate between them.</p><p>______</p><p> </p><p>The next morning, Tommy wakes up earlier than normal, before he knew Dream would appear to destroy his hard work. Tommy walked past the beach on his way to the Nether Portal, barely sparing a glance towards the broken compass, a symbol of cracked friendship, lying on the sand.<br/>When the blonde reached the Portal, he stared into it deeply. The glowing purple of the gateway reflected back on his bluish-gray eyes, blinding, but he relished the pain that came with it. Tommy took one step forward, entering the land he was forbidden from.</p><p>Sneaking towards where he heard voices from, the exile took a look around the corner. He saw Tubbo talking to Quackity, but he couldn't look away. Not when Tubbo made eye contact with him, not when he saw Dream appear out of the corner of his vision, not when he heard the order.</p><p>"TommyInnit, you have been exiled. I can kill you <strong>on-site</strong>. You had been warned before."</p><p>Something snapped inside of Tommy. He turned and ran, No, not because he was scared of losing his last life, but as an act of defiance. He had seen Tubbo. His last wish was fulfilled. If only he had looked on for a moment longer, than he would have seen the tears in the corner of his ex-best friend's eyes, and seen him call out for Dream to stop, although the President's voice was lost among the gusts of wind that followed the Admin's chase after Tommy.<br/>Tommy did not want to lose his last life to Dream. He didn't know if he really was ready to die, but no way in Hell would he let Dream be the one to take it. Leaping through the Nether Portal, Tommy came upon the edge of the path.<br/>The blonde stared down at the lava below, bubbling brightly. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, maybe... just maybe, he could escape his feelings. After all, there was nothing left to live for, right? Just one step off of the charred blackstone, just one...<br/>Leaning forward, arms outstretched, Tommy leans forward. He falls at a rapid pace. Contrary to popular belief, time waits for no one. No one at all. And that is why Tommy screamed in agony as he reached the burning pit below faster than he has intended.</p><p>If only he had hesitated a little longer. Had kept some of his will to live. Had held up his resolve better. Alas, he hadn't. So, Tommy did not see the gloved hand that belonged to Dream reach out to save him, he did not see Ghostbur's horrified expression as he watched Tommy fall, and he certainly did not see the tears that fell from both of their eyes as the message popped up on the SMP's communicators.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>[TommyInnit's heart went up in flames]</strong>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Ghosted</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ok, wow. Thank you for all the support! Really, it means a lot to me. I have read the comments, and they made me laugh and appreciate it even more. This was just supposed to be writing practice, but people really liked it. Um- I don't know why so many people chose to read this or leave Kudos, but-- hey! Thanks! Have another chapter as a thank you.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tubbo stared down at the compass he held in one hand, while he held his communicator in the other. The needle was spinning wildly, most likely a result of the message sent out to everyone on the server.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <strong>[TommyInnit's heart went up in flames]</strong>
</p><p><br/>Why! Why hadn't Tubbo gone after him, or called louder, or even exiled him in the first place. It was because of Dream. Tubbo knew Dream was trying to break them apart. He did not think that the masked man would go as far enough to drive Tommy to suicide.<br/>They were best friends! If only he could have don't something more, done something right. Sighing, he started to feel warm tears dribble down the sides of his face. The words on his communicator blurred, and he let out a strangled scream. He had just lost his best friend. They should have run away when they had the chance to. Before things got bad. Before Tubbo made them bad.<br/>Feeling a hand on his shoulder, Tubbo turned around, about to tell Quackity he was fine, but the limb felt much too cold to be of the living. Ghostbur, then? Why was he here? No. It wasn't either of them.</p><p>His communicator buzzed again.</p><p>
  <strong>[TommyInnit has made the achievement: <em>I Don't Believe In Ghosts</em>]</strong>
</p><p>Tubbo found himself staring into bright blue eyes, the figure having severe burns all around, and ripped clothing. No, this person was not Ghostbur. It was Tommy. Eyes widening, Tubbo leaped forward to attempt a hug, but fell through his best friend. He refused to think of Tommy in any other way.<br/>He grasped at the ground desperately, hearing a voice behind him.</p><p>"Um... are you alright, sir?"</p><p>Looking back, this Tommy was not sharing the same qualities as the Tommy he knew. The ghost had cheery eyes, worry etched onto his face, (probably for Tubbo), and hadn't even gone into the tense position he was used to seeing the other boy in.</p><p>"T-Tommy?"</p><p>"That's my name!"</p><p>Tommy responded with no hesitation</p><p>"You seem sad, would you like some Red?"</p><p>He held out his hand with a clump of 'Red' to Tubbo, who just stared at it until Tommy spoke.</p><p>"No? Ok, then..."</p><p>"No, no, here." Tubbo reached out, grasping at the gooey substance, grimacing as he tried not to let more tears fall.</p><p>Tommy smiled, floating a little higher. The sun shone on his ghastly pale-gray figure, and the horrid burns that scarred his body were more visible. Despite that, the ghost still smiled. Oh, Tommy. What could I have done to help you. Anything really. One small change, even a big one like rebelling against the exile that Dream was so clearly forcing on us.</p><p>____</p><p> </p><p>Dream was slumped over on the ground. Tears were falling from underneath his mask, the daunting smile seeming to haunt the nightmare of the ghost watching, his own bloody tears flowing to match.</p><p>"You..."</p><p>The emerald-eyed man looked up into the ghostly figure's glowing, white eyes.</p><p>"You did this! You killed him!"</p><p>His voice seemed to echo, although still keeping it's power. The sheer volume of it almost shattered Dream's eardrums.</p><p>"I- I never meant for it to go this far... only to, you know, scare him a little, keep him away from L'manburg..." Dream tried to plead with the other, his voice trailing off. It was true, all he had wanted was to keep Tommy away, not, definitely not, drive him to suicide... he should have seen it earlier, when final lives were taken from other residents.</p><p>"No. You wanted power."</p><p>Ah. That was it.</p><p>"Ghostbur, please-"</p><p>"Wilbur."</p><p>"Wha- huh?"</p><p>"My name is Wilbur, <strong>Nightmare</strong>."</p><p>Dream seemed to wither beneath Wilbur's gaze. Nightmare. He supposed he was well-suited for it, with what he had done to the rest of the SMP.</p><p>"Y-yes, Wilbur."</p><p>Wilbur turned away, disdain evident in his movements. He strode back in the direction of the Nether Portal, back to the rest of the server.</p><p>____</p><p> </p><p>He remembered. Just as Tommy was falling. The tears that dropped alongside the broken boy had cracked the chamber of memories he had tried so hard to conceal away right down the middle. Straight though the heart.</p><p>Warping through the portal, Wilbur sighed as he saw Tubbo, collapsed on the ground while clutching his communicator. The massage of Tommy's death had reached him, the ghost would assume.</p><p>Wilbur froze. Next to Tommy, a transparent hand on Tubbo's shoulder, was a ghost. It was littered with burn scars, and a bit of lava still seeping out from one of it's dark eyesockets. Wilbur didn't know of any other ghosts besides himself, and that couldn't be Wilbur because he was him. Right. That made no sense whatsoever.</p><p>No one else had died recently besides... Tommy. It all was fitting together, the lava, the burns, Tubbo! The puzzle pieces were connecting.</p><p>Wilbur rushed forward, snapping out of his momentary trance to wrap his arms around the other ghost, eliciting a small squeak. It had been so, so long since he had been able to hold someone else, although he wasn't sure if it was for the worst, or better that it was his little brother.</p><p>"Ghostbur?"</p><p>He heard Tubbo talk from next to him, his voice shaky from his crying, the tear tracks flat-out evidence. Letting go of Tommy, he turned towards the president.</p><p>"No, Tubbo. Wilbur."</p><p>The other boy's sky-blue eyes widened, just a fraction, but it was enough to let Wilbur know he was understood. Tubbo always was perceptive. He smiled sadly at both of the younger males. They were just sixteen-year-olds, they really didn't deserve the pain and torture that they were put through. Look at them now, his family. Two of them barely even there, left as fragments of memories by permadeath, and the rest of them broken down, tired.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Uhm- take this. Lol please comment it makes my day</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. I miss my home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So... I did change a few things to the earlier writing, such as spelling mistakes and Tommy's death message. Uh, have this. </p><p>-Shadowstorm's Depressed Ass</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Phil startled as his communicator beeped. What possible message could have been sent to him now, at all times? Taking a look, his eyes widened, slowly filling with fat tears.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>[TommyInnit's heart went up in flames]</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>"What..? Aha... no.. this has to be a joke, right? That... no... Tommy has more lives, right? Right?!" Philza cried out to no one in particular. The man fell onto the ground, violent sobs wracking his body. His winges beat the air around him, slowly coming to rest around his body. His salty tears dripped onto the floor. </p><p> </p><p>Tommy had to be alive.</p><p> </p><p>The same Tommy he held in his arms years ago. The same Tommy he snuggled with after a particularly harsh nightmare. The same Tommy that he pressed small kisses to the top of his blonde head while scolding him for his recklessness. The same Tommy he groaned at after watching him do something mischevious. The SAME TOMMY that he grew up with. THE SAME TOMMY he cooked for countless times.</p><p> </p><p>The same Tommy he had sent... depressing messages to. The same Tommy had ignored the mental health of. The same Tommy that he was mourning now.</p><p> </p><p>________________________</p><p> </p><p>Technoblade stared down at the death message on his communicator. The words were starting to blur together.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Who did this..?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Who...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Blood...</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The hybrid knew who.</p><p> </p><p>Dream</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Blood for the Blood God.</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>IM SO SORRY HAHAHA I ACCIDENTIALLY WROTE 'hi sex-best friend' INSTEAD OF ' his ex-best friend' AND NO ONE CORRECTED MEEEEEE</p></blockquote></div></div>
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